Sake Johannes De Vente of BADHOEVEDORP, HOLLAND, aka "HANS DE VENTE" aka "HANS DEVENTE" aka "HANS DEMENTED" is dying.
AGAIN.
On one of his latest blogs (he has had hundreds of them) he explains that he went to the doctor (again) and the news was not good (again).
What would you do if YOU got a death sentence? Why, buy a stupid ceramic cup via mail order and brag about it! Sure, buy more stuff that you will be using FOR YEARS TO COME.
Hansy Pansy LOVES to show off his stupid toys and corny souvenirs. In the background you see the Twin Towers souvenir he bought WELL AFTER 9/11.
In his "feel sorry for me" mode he keeps insisting HE was right there. He has no pictures of himself there. No shots of himself covered in ashes and sobbing. He LOVES taking selfies but curiously, NOTHING from his supposed NYC trip. No hotel pictures. Because he is a pathological liar.
He loves to show off his toys because he never grew up. He LOVES his collection of corny JOHN DEERE garbage. He keeps this crap on display in his windmill over in Badhoevedorp.
Let's get back to his drama queen DEATH antics.
Pathological Liar HANS DE VENTE has been doing the "feel sorry for me, I'm dying" game almost as soon as he got on the Internet. Any time somebody told him he was being an asshole, he came up with: "That's no way to talk to me. I have a fatal illness. You would not want to be me." Well, yes, NOBODY would want to be HANS DE VENTE, the ASSHOLE of BLOGSPOT. The ASS SPOT of BLOG HOLE.
Over the years he has posted dozens of photos of himself looking sorrowful, standing next to medical equipment, wearing a fake bandage, or Photoshopping himself to pretend he had a swollen lip. Hey, his big fat ugly lip can't get more swollen than it is.
Any time he scrapes his hand, bumps his head or has an allergic reaction that puffs up an eye, he pretends he's dying. "I got into a car accident. It doesn't look good. Internal damage!" That kind of shit. He writes it on his blog and he bores everyone in Zinhof's shoutbox with his crybaby antics. Oooh, POOR HANSY PANSY got a BOO BOO.
This idiot is 73 and he acts like he's SEVEN. "Hey everybody, I have had a concussion. The doctor says this could be fatal. It does not look good."
This latest hilarity, pretending he has a BRAIN TUMOR, is just his excuse for being chewed out yet again by the other people who have to suffer to get the "goodies" in the Zinhof shoutbox. Zinhof, almost as senile and idiotic as HANS, loves the poor baby and won't kick him out. He's even turned the shoutbox PRIVATE just for HANSY PANSY to keep playing his games.
Hansy Pansy's latest blogs, cleverly titled DOUGEATDOUG and DOUGNOTDOUG (he uses DOUG in the shoutbox among dozens of others) includes this screencap:
Sniffle sniffle, wah wah wah.
Drama Queen Hans is again the martyr. He gives people so much stolen music. He even goes to other blogs and steals the posts and re-ups them as his own. How come nobody likes him? How come he doesn't get all the NICE COMMENTS he wants. He come not enough guys want to share gay porn with him? Only JOAO? Others got tired of it and walked away because his gay porn is too disgusting.
DRAMA QUEEN HANS. He only wishes he had a boyfriend to sneak off and meet all the time. He can only do it once in a great while.
When his emails were hacked, the guys who saw the posts were SO GROSSED OUT and EMBARRASSED by some of them, that they wouldn't even show them to all the Hans haters (there's an actual forum full of Hans haters, as well as a blog).
"No, I can't do that to him. As much as I hate him I am not going to show you all the photos. I look at a few and I trashed them. SORRY. I wish I could unsee them!"
Is this such a surprise for a moron who got fired by Sony after a spotty "career" of being a porter, a gofer, and a menial nothing? He has happily spent the past 15 years "on the government teat," as he puts it.
His idiot wife really IS an idiot. She's an autistic who hardly ever speaks. It was the best ugly fat Hans could do, but guess what. She never was interested in sex with him. She almost never went anywhere with him. She has one constant expression, which is of drugged out dimwitted serenity.
Poor Hansy. "She is my ROCK," he tells the world. Yes, that's about her IQ level.
Hansy, a true Psycho ala Norman Bates, has dressed himself up as his wife.
In fact, one of his favorite aliases has always been MARIA. That's the name of his wife. He claims. He is a liar, of course. Her name is MARIEKE, but since he is obsessed with pretending to be AMERICAN, he claims it's MARIA.
After he was told (yet again) to GO AWAY and stop annoying everyone, the members of Zinhof's secret shoutbox got a surprise: a new member. MARIA.
A WOMAN named MARIA was in the shoutbox, giving away Windham Hill garbage and sobbing over Blaze Foley country albums and doing all the stupid things HANS just did.
One person in the shoutbox instantly saw through the Drama Queen's drag:
"Some think impersonating a woman when everybody knows your a dick is in bad taste."
This was a smackdown when DRAMA QUEEN HANS began using the "I'm dying" excuse yet again. You noticed that? As MARIA:
"wishin some one with a handicap poor health is in extremely bad taste,especially someone you know nothing about except what anonymous ass holes write, but who you never met in real life."
Who'd want to meet an ugly fat waste of space like Hans De Vente? Fact: one of the guys from XTC recalled that Hans was "this really strange, big guy who kept following us everywhere." Hans claimed he was a big shot at Sony Nederland and could get them great publicity and gigs. So they tolerated the weird bastard and fell for a fake business card he used (no wonder he got FIRED at Sony).
"You know nothing..." Hans claims? No, everybody knows EVERYTHING about this idiot because he can't stop taking selfies of his ugly mug. He can't stop crying wolf about all the times he was dying from: tinnitis, diverticulitis, brainstem swelling, arthritis, stroke, heart attacks, ec. etc.
He's come crying to forums and shoutboxes writing "the FBI is after me" to "there is a traitor landwehr in Holland out to get me" and "it does not look good. I had a car accident." How many car accidents has this idiot had? DOZENS!
After somebody in the shoutbox told him to STOP posting so much C&W garbage, Hans declared: "I will not be here for several days. My wife fell down stairs and she cant move I have to do everything for her." Aww, the same bullshit. As soon as somebody tells him he's an asshole, he comes up with a "pity me" sob story lie.
His bullshit stories about his dimwit wife are so laughable, it's no surprise that somebody, catching him on blog thievery, used HAN'S WIFE as an alias to kick his fat ass:
You couldn't make up an idiot like Hans De Vente. Hans De Vente IS a pathological liar, a total lunatic, the most dishonest bastard in Blogdom, a constant thief, a dopey schizoid with hundreds of fake identities, and a worthless ugly old slob.
You can visit
https://dementedhansdevente.blogspot.com/
And you will find entire entries on how often this idiot has bid FAREWELL, and declared he was going to kill himself.
Hans has tried over the years to get others to kill themselves or fake their deaths. For a while, he had a partner in crime, a lunatic named Terry Beard. This guy appeared in now defunct forums with Hans (Hans helped ruin them and get them busted).
With Hans coaching him, he defended himself against stealing posts and over-posting C&W garbage by declaring: "I am doing the best I can with no hands."
WHAT? Yes, "LAZYREBEL" as he called himself, claimed, with Hansy Pansy's coaching, that his hands were blown off in Vietnam, and he was spending painful hours doing hunt-and-peck typing with his hooks, JUST so that a rock forum could suffer with 128 bit-rate discographies of Faron Young.
"LAZYREBEL" as slow-witted as he was, began to realize that listening to HANS as the WORST thing he could do. Even showing up in forums under other names didn't work. HANS spotted him and kept outing him and sending him PM's.
"LAZYREBEL" being a straight guy, married with kids, did NOT want to see Hansy's gay porn. Another reason why...
....he faked his own death! Yes, to get away from HANS DE VENTE, the demented DUTCH DOUCHE, Terry had his wife JUNE declare that he had died. HANS instantly put up a memorial blog to the dead "LAZYREBEL," and posted a Hank William discography. He then vowed to post every C&W album he could find for poor Terry, his best friend. (Zinhof at the time was regularly being cursed at by Hans, because Zinhof had a rival blog that was doing better than HIS.)
You can't make this up! Well, you can be HANS and make up pathological lies about dying, and even declare somebody else died. The truth is that Terry found a few obscure forums that Hans didn't know about, used a name Hans could never have guessed about, and enjoyed a bit of peace.
The dead "LAZYREBEL" lived about 8 years longer than the obituary-blog HANS DE VENTE posted for him. He died last year.
Terry was actually a good guy. The phrase "he meant well" applies to HIM and not HANS. Terry was simply a hick who loved country music and didn't really understand that nobody else in rock forums did, that over-posting was irritating, and that posting 128 bit-rate (often even HALF that!) was not useful. He eventually came around to declaring that HANS DE VENTE was a horrible jerk and that he wished he'd never become "friends" with him.
Terry died at 74. It's quite possible HANS DE VENTE will finally drop dead at 74, too. It's his KARMA.
Hans is 73 now, and has gotten a LOT of karma. He steals everybody's music and deletes everybody's music. So he got a mild case of tinnitis. He blows it up into epic proportions, and has declared over and over that he can't listen to music because it's too painful...all he wants to do is SHARE and get praise for being such a kind fellow. Then he turns around and deletes anything that didn't get a NICE COMMENT, and then comes back into the shoutbox with a new name and a cry of "I need this album, I want to hear it..." Yes? YOU want to HEAR an album when you insist it's TOO PAINFUL now??
KARMA. He's been a pain in the ass so he got diverticulitis. He didn't die from it, and after a few people told him to dry up, he stopped mentioning it.
KARMA. He is brainless, so he gets a swelling in his brainstem. He gets a brain tumor. Or has he? He's such a PATHOLOGICAL LIAR. And a stupid one.
He keeps revising his lies. The last time he claimed he was going to kill himself, he added a line about "if you don't hear from me for a few weeks, then I will have died." Meaning, he was leaving the coffin lid open. He wasn't REALLY going to kill himself, even though everyone wishes he would.
This latest lie about dying has him covering his ugly ass. It's a "slow" brain tumor. How convenient. That gives him time to buy more useless trinkets and souvenirs for his "show and tell" blogs. Lookie lookie, I bought a ceramic coffee cup!
It's a "slow" brain tumor, so he isn't going off on a "bucket list" of things anyone would want to do, like travel. Or to spend some time in church. Nope. HE spends his time sniffing around other blogs and dragging back complete discographies, re-posting them with his own links. That's what a normal person does when he's DYING?
Hans De Vente doesn't have any slow-moving tumor. He IS a slow moving tumor.
